4 Ways to Combat Loneliness
Feeling lonely sucks. I hate admitting I feel lonely more than I probably should feel that way. There are a million reasons people feel lonely even when in a room filled with people. My own probably comes from being in my head more than I should be, but feeling lonely has a negative impact on well-being no matter what. It can lead to increase sadness and even lower self-esteem. Solving the probably isn’t just as simple as finding more people to be around. It actually requires a bit more effort depending on the person. The most important thing anyone, even myself, can do is acknowledge that it’s a feeling. Accept that it’s happening and then find the tools to cope with it. Feeling lonely isn’t necessarily good or bad but it’s just a thing. Like a little rain cloud hanging over one’s head. It will pass eventually, but until it does everything just feels….awful.
It can be really hard to feel alone especially when you can’t really come up with the words to describe it to someone else. Even if the words were there, the person you’re speaking to may just not get it - or even feel insulted you feel alone when they are there and listening. And sometimes it can feel like you’re just better off not saying anything at all. No matter how it happens, there are ways to make things feel just a little bit better. Here are a few ways I try to cope with those lonely times in life.
Note: I am not a mental health professional and this post is not intended to diagnose or treat any illnesses. This is merely a personal suggestion of what has helped me with the struggles of loneliness.
Manage Social Media Feeds
Social media can feel like both a blessing and a curse. Sometimes it’s fun to curate and create content while seeing what others are getting up to, but other times it can feel a lot more isolating - not to mention left out. It’s hard not to constantly compare oneself to others or just feel like everyone else is much better off. Social media should always be approached as a highlight reel. It’s not exactly real life in the sense that people don’t really show the bummer times. It’s all about the good ones and, most times, the highly staged ones. If social media starts to feel like a time-consuming emotional vacuum, it might be time to reduce the amount of time to spend on it. Easier said than done I’m sure, but there are also ways of making it a better experience from muting people or curating a feed filled with uplifting, inspiring people. When in doubt, unplug. There is nothing wrong with taking a break - it will be there.
Indulge in Self Care
For the last couple of years, self-care has been a buzz word but in reality, it’s more than just some Instagram caption. When you’re feeling lonely, it’s important to realize you are your own best friend. It’s important to take care of yourself in the ways you enjoy especially when you are feeling down. Eating better, working out, and getting more sleep are just a couple of ways to invest in yourself. Don’t forget the things you love doing whether it’s soaking in a bath, meditating, or just enjoying some phone-free face mask time. The key is not to guilt yourself for enjoying the simple pleasures in life. A negative attitude certainly won’t help decrease the feelings of loneliness, but enjoying some quiet time can help you reframe the feelings or see them in a new light.
Get Active
This is one of my favorite ways for combating loneliness and a serious non-negotiable of my life regardless. Some days it might feel like a struggle especially when you’re not feeling 100%. I know the feeling and there are half a million ways I can talk myself out of working out. But getting active has a ton of benefits and there are is a way to get moving no matter what you like to do. Get outside and take a walk, do some yoga, or just have a dance party. I have found that being in the gym is a good social interaction for myself - even if I don’t end up saying a word to anyone the entire time. Being in a place with others has social benefits and just makes me feel less alone. They may not know i’m going through something or feeling lonely, but there is just something I need from time to time that doesn’t feel so isolating. This is where joining a workout class, a club, or finding a buddy to run/work out with can come in handy.
Try Something New
During the pandemic, there was no shortage of time to try a new hobby. TikTok and Instagram exploded with a new slew of creators including yours truly. It’s not always easy for an adult to find a new hobby they enjoy and even harder to find the time to keep one going. But they can honestly be a great outlet for whatever ails you. Hobbies bring you joy and can even bring you closer to people. Maybe you take a cooking class and get to meet new people or, if you’re like me, you find a digital hobby that lets you express your creativity. I have been blogging on and off for over a decade. A hobby that turned into a passion, all because I was feeling a lack of connection with people around me and my life. This tiny little corner of the internet, my internet, has become an important passion of mine that I prioritize in my free time. The same goes for Instagram and TikTok. Creating content brings me joy, occupies my restless mind, and lets me experiment, have fun, and learn something new.
When In Doubt - Therapy
Feelings of loneliness often travel in a pack with other mental health problems - primarily depression. A pack that can exacerbate the feelings we are having to begin with. Therapy can feel like a really difficult step to take but can be really critical if depression is a huge consequence or cause of feeling lonely. Today there are so many therapy options that finding the right one is relatively easy. Opening up and talking about things can feel like a different story. Sometimes we really need to just get all of our thoughts out there and learn tools to reframe exactly what we are thinking and feeling. There are tons of techniques that therapy can teach that help combat all types of feelings, thoughts, and situations that are beneficial to overall wellbeing. At the end of the day, we aren’t really as alone as we feel and there are plenty of things we can do to increase connection.
